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| From Jul 15, 2011 |
Friday, July 15, 2011
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
a bumpy ride into my 30's
January 30th...the last time I blogged....really, REALLY?! Quite honestly, that's depressing. However, I have been missing the blog world lately. I set up this site as a way to journal and post pictures about our kids and life seems to have gotten in the way. EVERY.TIME.I.TRY.TO.MAKE.IT.A.HABIT.I.FAIL. I think about it all the time, I just don't sit down and do it.
I turned 30 this year and I think that the months leading up to it I started to become a little anxious and it's pretty much been all down hill from there. So far, I don't like being 30. I have put a tremendous amount of pressure on myself to figure out-what it is that I want to out of my 30's. In my 20's, I graduated college, married the man of my dreams, had two beautiful babies, bought a house, got a dog and started my career. Now what?! Yes, I want to enjoy every minute of my life and watch my babies grow up, but I have a deeper desire to find greater purpose and greater meaning. I think about this all the time, so much so that some days in consumes my life. When I talk to people about this I think that sometimes people think I am crazy- relax, enjoy life, you're so blessed. Yes, I would agree with all of that, but this is really important to me.
A couple of months ago I finally broke down and bought an SLR Nikon camera. I have been dreaming of a camera like this, and it's AWESOME! It quite honestly has been a huge outlet for me. It allows me to funnel my energy toward something that simply makes me really happy. Last week I took Vada out on little photo shot and the pictures are adorable. The kids are getting a little tired of the camera, but always willing if there is a treat involved. ;O. There is still so much that I have to learn and I am excited for the challenge. I am taking a couple of classes next month and really plan on increasing my skills. So with that I am going to start using this blog to post some of the pictures that I take. I am hoping that it serves several purposes- it will allow for me to post regular pictures of the kids and it will also be an a way for me look back on the progress that I have made as I attempt to really understand the Art of Photography. I hope that you come along for the ride!!
I turned 30 this year and I think that the months leading up to it I started to become a little anxious and it's pretty much been all down hill from there. So far, I don't like being 30. I have put a tremendous amount of pressure on myself to figure out-what it is that I want to out of my 30's. In my 20's, I graduated college, married the man of my dreams, had two beautiful babies, bought a house, got a dog and started my career. Now what?! Yes, I want to enjoy every minute of my life and watch my babies grow up, but I have a deeper desire to find greater purpose and greater meaning. I think about this all the time, so much so that some days in consumes my life. When I talk to people about this I think that sometimes people think I am crazy- relax, enjoy life, you're so blessed. Yes, I would agree with all of that, but this is really important to me.
A couple of months ago I finally broke down and bought an SLR Nikon camera. I have been dreaming of a camera like this, and it's AWESOME! It quite honestly has been a huge outlet for me. It allows me to funnel my energy toward something that simply makes me really happy. Last week I took Vada out on little photo shot and the pictures are adorable. The kids are getting a little tired of the camera, but always willing if there is a treat involved. ;O. There is still so much that I have to learn and I am excited for the challenge. I am taking a couple of classes next month and really plan on increasing my skills. So with that I am going to start using this blog to post some of the pictures that I take. I am hoping that it serves several purposes- it will allow for me to post regular pictures of the kids and it will also be an a way for me look back on the progress that I have made as I attempt to really understand the Art of Photography. I hope that you come along for the ride!!
Sunday, January 30, 2011
What I LOVE about......
*** Presten ***
Daddy is gone on his annual fishing trip and the rugrats and I are starting to miss him... a lot.. It is funny how the house tends to stay a whole lot cleaner when he is gone:) I am not sure why, but I seem to be able to keep things in order pretty well. While he has been gone I have been reminded about all things the things that I love about him...
* He does the dishes and the laundry (including the ironing) and rarely complains... I hate to do both and he knows it so he willingly does it on a regular basis. I have been trying to keep up while he has been gone- it's hard work!
* He loves people for who they are. He has a BIG heart and he does a really good job of making people feel good about who they are.
*He's funny.. don't tell him I said that:) He is always joking around and making people laugh. He is really fun to be around.
*He LOVES Jaxson and Vada and is the BEST dad! He is pretty much a big kid himself so he loves playing hide and seek with them, wrestling, sledding, swimming and anything else the kids love to do- he is there!
*He is determined. I have most recently seen this through his quest to be healthy. He has lost 30 pounds in 3 months with a whole lot of goals for 2011.
*He loves to hang out with me. We have so much fun together. We love to hang out with our friends, but more than anything we like when it is just us.
***Jaxson***
*He is the sweetest boy I know... He, like his daddy has a really big heart. He is very emotional and sensitive, which I think he gets from both his mom and dad. :) I have always known this about him through his compassion for his sister, but I am seeing this more and more with his friends. I picked up Jaxson from school a couple weeks ago and his teacher told him that there was a little boy at school that day that really needed a friend and Jaxson was so sweet to him and went over and beyond what they typically see. He cares so much about other people. Now that we are going to the gym more he has also met a lot of new friends. I work in childcare 1 day a week for a couple hours and several times there has been a mom that has come in and while picking up their child will say- do you know who's mom Jaxson is? I usually laugh a little and say mine:) They go on to tell me how much their child talks about Jaxson:) He even has about 4 little girls that talk about him and are so excited when they see him! He loves it- he just likes to have a really good time!
*We love how much he loves sports! He knows WAY more about football than I do! He really gets into it! We are looking forward to a spring and summer filled with lots of soccer and baseball!
*He loves being a boy! He loves legos, transformers, power rangers etc... He always has to bring one with him to school to show his teacher. Luckily she doesn't mind and he at times has a hard time with transitions so having a little toy with him provides little comfort. He is usually the first one dropped off in the morning so it gives him and Chantell something to talk about.
*I love that he is a mommy's boy. He loves me so much. He LOVES to cuddle- which I LOVE.
***Vada***
*This girl makes me laugh harder than anyone I know! She is SO funny! Can you guess what she is doing in the picture above? Well she gave her baby a booger kiss so she is wiping the boogers off her baby! :) She has an incredible imagination. She is always coming up with different stories to make us laugh.*She rarely sits still (sometimes, I don't always love this). She is ALWAYS thinking and goes and million miles an hour until she crashes. She usually wakes up happy and the minute she get out of bed her little brain is going. She does not have a voice control, so we are constantly reminding her to use her quiet voice. These of course are things that do drive us crazy, but they are all things that make Vada, Vada.
*She loves to help. She loves to do everything that I am doing especially in the kitchen. Her little stool is constantly moving over to me to see what I am doing. "Mom watcha doing??" "I want to help" comes out of her little mouth all day long.
*Her little dimples... seriously could they be any cuter. It is SO hard to be mad at her. When she smiles her whole face lights up. She laughs a lot and I love it!
*She loves to try to foods. She loves to eat - so this makes sense. However, she is pretty adventurous. We told the kids that we would like to take them out for sushi. Vada said, OK but I want pink chopsticks! :) Hopefully we can find a time to go soon!
*We love listening to her in her bed after we put her to bed. Vada needs long winding down time before she falls asleep. We now allow her to be up in her room, preferably in her bed looking at a book. She usually talks and talks until she conks out! She will usually come out 15 times to go to the bathroom or show us something, but we love it. We don't get mad, because she really doesn't get it. We just tell her to go back to her room and she listens- at least until she has to go potty again:)
I have to say, I have a pretty blessed life with three people that make my life so happy and so rich! This year- 2011- I am going to continue to take in all the things that I love about my family.
Have a great week! The Bean's
Friday, January 28, 2011
and we are off to an amazing start! 2011
Wow!! Is it 2011 Already?!
2010 was quite a year, part of it I would rather not relive, but the majority of it was pretty sweet! When life gets really tough it reminds us how important our friends and family are. Our family made an intentional decision to enhance the relationships of the people that we really care about, through spending as much time with them as we possibly could. Our hardships also made us realize how blessed we are and that we have a really good life. To complain and whine about our lives was ridiculous and was taking away from who we really wanted to be- the best parents, the friends, the wife/husband, daughter/son. We have replaced anything negative in our lives with lots of love and lots of laughs and in return are having the time of our lives!
2010- We also started our healthy lifestyle journey! We have found a gym that both of us LOVE! Working out is no longer a drag, but something that we look forward too and can’t imagine our lives without! The best part- the kids LOVE IT TOO! They even take BOSU jr. classes! Presten started with a personal trainer in October and is at the gym 6 days a week and is literally working his butt off! He has lost 30 pounds and 10% body fat!! YES, I said 10! He looks great, feels great and is really proud of himself!! He is very motivated to continue on his journey! I am supporting him in every way I can, but mostly trying to walk the walk with him! I go to a lot of his classes with him and I’m trying to make really healthy meals. I think we make a pretty great team!
So what does that mean for 2011??? Well a pretty high set of expectations! This year we are all about trying new things! Sports, restaurants, foods and activities! Three weeks into the year- I think that we have the restaurant one covered for awhile! We are planning on doing the Warrior Dash in July, but still need to maybe get one more 5k on the books this summer! Presten has started some interval running and really wants to see how he would do in a race! I have always said ‘I AM NOT A RUNNER!’ Well, this year is not going to be what I am not, but more of a ‘WHY AM I NOT A RUNNER?’ I CAN be! Treadmill – here I come! This year is also going to be a year of simplifying my life. More to come on that in a later post!
We already started the year out with a trip to the cabin! Our friends Chris and Sue invited us up, along with two other sets of neighbors to Emily, MN for a weekend away! It was a much needed time away- full of a whole lot relaxation and of course a few little shenanigans! Including little miss Vada falling in the ice fishing hole!!! Of course, this would happen to her! Here are some pictures! Enjoy!
2010 was quite a year, part of it I would rather not relive, but the majority of it was pretty sweet! When life gets really tough it reminds us how important our friends and family are. Our family made an intentional decision to enhance the relationships of the people that we really care about, through spending as much time with them as we possibly could. Our hardships also made us realize how blessed we are and that we have a really good life. To complain and whine about our lives was ridiculous and was taking away from who we really wanted to be- the best parents, the friends, the wife/husband, daughter/son. We have replaced anything negative in our lives with lots of love and lots of laughs and in return are having the time of our lives!
2010- We also started our healthy lifestyle journey! We have found a gym that both of us LOVE! Working out is no longer a drag, but something that we look forward too and can’t imagine our lives without! The best part- the kids LOVE IT TOO! They even take BOSU jr. classes! Presten started with a personal trainer in October and is at the gym 6 days a week and is literally working his butt off! He has lost 30 pounds and 10% body fat!! YES, I said 10! He looks great, feels great and is really proud of himself!! He is very motivated to continue on his journey! I am supporting him in every way I can, but mostly trying to walk the walk with him! I go to a lot of his classes with him and I’m trying to make really healthy meals. I think we make a pretty great team!
So what does that mean for 2011??? Well a pretty high set of expectations! This year we are all about trying new things! Sports, restaurants, foods and activities! Three weeks into the year- I think that we have the restaurant one covered for awhile! We are planning on doing the Warrior Dash in July, but still need to maybe get one more 5k on the books this summer! Presten has started some interval running and really wants to see how he would do in a race! I have always said ‘I AM NOT A RUNNER!’ Well, this year is not going to be what I am not, but more of a ‘WHY AM I NOT A RUNNER?’ I CAN be! Treadmill – here I come! This year is also going to be a year of simplifying my life. More to come on that in a later post!
We already started the year out with a trip to the cabin! Our friends Chris and Sue invited us up, along with two other sets of neighbors to Emily, MN for a weekend away! It was a much needed time away- full of a whole lot relaxation and of course a few little shenanigans! Including little miss Vada falling in the ice fishing hole!!! Of course, this would happen to her! Here are some pictures! Enjoy!
The whole crew!
All the kids minus Vada- this was after she fell in the hole! :)
Jaxson cleaning out his ice hole!
Sue trying to teach me some Zumba moves :P
Zach, Alex and Jaxson
Our little muscle men!
Silly boys!
Sending everyone lots of LOVE!! The Bean's!
Sunday, November 7, 2010
Reflect. Redefine. Relax. Receive.
Well- once again it has been a little while…. However, the past couple months have been partly spent reflecting on our family’s life journey over the past year. October marked the year anniversary of our ‘adventure’ in finding a job for Presten that he was passionate about. As I reflect back on those five months, amidst all the financial stressors was this yearning for finding true meaning in my life and for our family. I reflected daily and made an intentional effort to ensure that every decision that I made was out of love. In return, my trust in God and faith was renewed and gave me hope for the future.
It is amazing how fast that can be reversed. I don’t think that I am all that different from most people. When do people tend to turn to their faith- in times of struggle, heartache, pain… And it is during that time that you say ‘I will never take anything for granted again’ or ‘I recognize now what is most important in my life’. The layers are peeled back and it is that true vulnerability that stares you in the face and in some cases you don’t like what you see…. You set new goals, seek purpose- you redefine your life….
However, eventually…. Your life starts to get back on the track and you start moving and then you start going a little faster and little faster until you reach the destination that you promised yourself you would never go to again. HOW DOES THIS HAPPEN?!!!
Well, in our case, we held onto this purpose for quite awhile or until our lives started to spin out of control and holding on to our ‘life purpose’ slowly started to slip down on the priority list. We were no longer making intentional decisions or thankful for life’s gifts. Our hearts started to become toxic. What did this look like? Well in our house, a whole lot of crabbiness, anxiety, rudeness and frustration. This morning in church Pastor Jeremiah focused on the ‘heart’ and I think it really relates to this. He said look at your life like a river, there times that you find there is a lot of toxins in the river and you start to try and fish them out, but what happens? More and more toxic fish show up. Why? Because you have to change the source of the toxins and the source is your heart. If you work to change your heart there are going to be less toxic fish in the water. Are you guilty of this? I am. There are times when things are not going well and I say well maybe I need to remove this… or change that… but that just ends up becoming one big cycle. It is not all about removing pieces of your life it is about changing what is in your heart.
About one month ago, Presten and I decided it was time to sit down to talk through all our toxins. Life moves so fast and sometimes it is just simply easier to keep fishing than to deal with the source. This one conversation has changed our marriage. We redefined our commitment and things in our lives that we place value on. Thinking about it now, I think that it can be summed up in how we treat each daily interaction with each other along with our own personal health inside and out. Sometimes it takes just one conversation to be steered back on course. Relationships are hard- not just marriage relationships. They take a lot of work, but they also necessary because they fill us up. They can give us the energy needed to perform our spiritual gifts. God intended for us to have human interaction- that is why he created Eve- but he didn’t say it would be easy.
So now that we have had some time to reflect and redefine – we have also realized the need to relax. The times that we start to drift are the times that book our schedules solid. So now that have made relationships with our friends and families intentional we need to find the balance maintaining these relationships, but really taking the time to not just ‘be a spectator of our own lives.’ We allow life to just pass us by. We need to be actively present in every moment. Lastly we need to openly receive every gift. Jaxson and Vada give us ‘gifts’ every day, but we are not always open to them. When I am rushed or crunched for time I am less likely to recognize that my whole life is filled with gifts and blessings. I rarely take the time to ‘see’ them. I challenge you to be open to seeing all the gifts that surround you- everyday.
Today- I feel rejuvenated! My parents took the kids for OVER 24 hours! I call that BRAVE! Presten and I went to a movie, out for dinner, came home and watched another movie, but most importantly spent some much needed quality time together. The kids have kept us insanely busy over the past couple months. Jaxson started basketball and he loves it! They actually have them playing little scrimmage games. He has been making baskets, passing, dribbling and learning game rules. He is loving learning a new sport. Little miss Vada started swimming for the first time this Fall. This however, is not going quite as hot. It is very hit or miss if she will get in the water! Sometimes there are tears, maybe a little pouting and other days she is all for it and gets right in the water! I guess this is really no different than any other part of her life- you just don’t know what you are going to get!
Vada and Jaxson are both going to St. David’s Center for preschool this year. They are both doing amazing and are very well adjusted. When I drop Vada off she says “bye mom, love you!” WOW-was that unexpected! It is exciting that they can be at a place where they are so comfortable! And that I am just steps away!! Vada has come down to my office several times now during the day to give me a quick hug and kiss and then back up to class! Her teacher calls her ‘jellybean’ which we have now adopted in our family for her. I think that it is very suiting!
Well time to unpack from the weekend and prepare for the week! Peace! The Bean’s
Our little munchkins!!
It is amazing how fast that can be reversed. I don’t think that I am all that different from most people. When do people tend to turn to their faith- in times of struggle, heartache, pain… And it is during that time that you say ‘I will never take anything for granted again’ or ‘I recognize now what is most important in my life’. The layers are peeled back and it is that true vulnerability that stares you in the face and in some cases you don’t like what you see…. You set new goals, seek purpose- you redefine your life….
However, eventually…. Your life starts to get back on the track and you start moving and then you start going a little faster and little faster until you reach the destination that you promised yourself you would never go to again. HOW DOES THIS HAPPEN?!!!
Well, in our case, we held onto this purpose for quite awhile or until our lives started to spin out of control and holding on to our ‘life purpose’ slowly started to slip down on the priority list. We were no longer making intentional decisions or thankful for life’s gifts. Our hearts started to become toxic. What did this look like? Well in our house, a whole lot of crabbiness, anxiety, rudeness and frustration. This morning in church Pastor Jeremiah focused on the ‘heart’ and I think it really relates to this. He said look at your life like a river, there times that you find there is a lot of toxins in the river and you start to try and fish them out, but what happens? More and more toxic fish show up. Why? Because you have to change the source of the toxins and the source is your heart. If you work to change your heart there are going to be less toxic fish in the water. Are you guilty of this? I am. There are times when things are not going well and I say well maybe I need to remove this… or change that… but that just ends up becoming one big cycle. It is not all about removing pieces of your life it is about changing what is in your heart.
About one month ago, Presten and I decided it was time to sit down to talk through all our toxins. Life moves so fast and sometimes it is just simply easier to keep fishing than to deal with the source. This one conversation has changed our marriage. We redefined our commitment and things in our lives that we place value on. Thinking about it now, I think that it can be summed up in how we treat each daily interaction with each other along with our own personal health inside and out. Sometimes it takes just one conversation to be steered back on course. Relationships are hard- not just marriage relationships. They take a lot of work, but they also necessary because they fill us up. They can give us the energy needed to perform our spiritual gifts. God intended for us to have human interaction- that is why he created Eve- but he didn’t say it would be easy.
So now that we have had some time to reflect and redefine – we have also realized the need to relax. The times that we start to drift are the times that book our schedules solid. So now that have made relationships with our friends and families intentional we need to find the balance maintaining these relationships, but really taking the time to not just ‘be a spectator of our own lives.’ We allow life to just pass us by. We need to be actively present in every moment. Lastly we need to openly receive every gift. Jaxson and Vada give us ‘gifts’ every day, but we are not always open to them. When I am rushed or crunched for time I am less likely to recognize that my whole life is filled with gifts and blessings. I rarely take the time to ‘see’ them. I challenge you to be open to seeing all the gifts that surround you- everyday.
Today- I feel rejuvenated! My parents took the kids for OVER 24 hours! I call that BRAVE! Presten and I went to a movie, out for dinner, came home and watched another movie, but most importantly spent some much needed quality time together. The kids have kept us insanely busy over the past couple months. Jaxson started basketball and he loves it! They actually have them playing little scrimmage games. He has been making baskets, passing, dribbling and learning game rules. He is loving learning a new sport. Little miss Vada started swimming for the first time this Fall. This however, is not going quite as hot. It is very hit or miss if she will get in the water! Sometimes there are tears, maybe a little pouting and other days she is all for it and gets right in the water! I guess this is really no different than any other part of her life- you just don’t know what you are going to get!
Vada and Jaxson are both going to St. David’s Center for preschool this year. They are both doing amazing and are very well adjusted. When I drop Vada off she says “bye mom, love you!” WOW-was that unexpected! It is exciting that they can be at a place where they are so comfortable! And that I am just steps away!! Vada has come down to my office several times now during the day to give me a quick hug and kiss and then back up to class! Her teacher calls her ‘jellybean’ which we have now adopted in our family for her. I think that it is very suiting!
Well time to unpack from the weekend and prepare for the week! Peace! The Bean’s
Our little munchkins!!
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